


That's Not A Dinosaur

by OliviaJen



Category: Transformers: Robots in Disguise (2015)
Genre: Don't Know Why This Obvious Problem Hasn't Been Addressed In This Cartoon, Drama, Funny, Gen, I Had Way To Much Fun Writing This, Team as Family, You Will Be Amused
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-24
Updated: 2016-03-24
Packaged: 2018-05-28 17:57:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,498
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6339517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OliviaJen/pseuds/OliviaJen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I SAID I WAS SORRY!"</p><p>A maniacal laugh echoed through out the junk yard causing shivers to run down everyone's spines.</p><p>"Oh, you will be Grimlock! YOU WILL BE!"</p><p>Find out why Bumblebee's about to murder poor Grimlock.</p>
            </blockquote>





	That's Not A Dinosaur

**Author's Note:**

> I regret nothing! And I unfortunately don't own Transformers either :( Oh well... on with the story!

Bumblebee knew he should have refused when Denny practically begged him to do a favor for him.

Apparently Denny was preoccupied with other issues (something about trying to avoid a visit from Russell's mother), which left no one to pick Russell up from school. Apparently the twelve year old had gotten himself in trouble, and was currently in the principal's office. If it was up to Bee he would have sent Optimus up here to pose as maybe Russell's grandfather or something, but the Prime made his point quite clear when he gave Bumblebee an exhausted look which obviously meant 'oh hell no'.

Denny however — as usual was not without fault, the collector messed up and called both him AND Sideswipe. Which was why he was now standing in the last position he ever wanted to be in — standing side-by-side with Sideswipe. He could feel a migraine already coming up.

But now that he thought about it, was probably for the best after all he and Sideswipe were the only ones with holographic watches Fixit built them not to long ago to be able to go out in public as humans, the mini con had yet to make more of them for the rest of the team.

"What's Russell done anyway?" Sideswipe asked him curiously. Bumblebee didn't blame him after all Russell had proven to be a responsible kid more than once.

Bumblebee sighed grimly. "That's something that unfortunately both Denny _and_  the principle failed to mention."

"Alright than let's just get this over with," Sideswipe said rolling his shoulders back. Bee nodded clearly just as eager as him to wrap this up, and reached out to knock on the door. Sideswipe pushed past him, threw the door open, and barged into the room ignoring his leader's disapproved frown.

The people present in the room, what looked like the principal, and another woman glanced up along with Russell who sighed in relief recognizing their holo forms.

"Hello?" The principle said, frowning at him. Her eyes raked over Sideswipe's holo form which was obviously a leather jacket and ripped jeans, and her lips pursed into a disapproving frown causing him roll his optics- er... eyes.

"Oh thank God you guys are he-," Russell paused noticing that his father wasn't with them. "Um... where's my dad?"

"He couldn't make it," Bee said smiling politely at the principal. "Hi, I'm Brandon Clay- this is Scott my- uh- my..." He could have said brother, but with the way he treated Sideswipe 24/7 it wouldn't have been convincing enough so he went with his second choice.

"My son!" He blurted out ignoring Sideswipe and Russell's weird looks. "And I'm- uh also... Russell's... uncle?"

The principle smiled at him approvingly obviously tolerating Bumblebee or Brandon's black tuxedo sweater, golden shirt, and neat jeans causing Sides to roll his eyes again. "It's nice to meet you Mr. Clay," she said shaking his hand. "I'm Mrs. Blake."

"And I'm Ms. Jessica," The young redheaded women beside Russell said gesturing to two nearby seats. "Please take a seat, we have a lot to discuss."

As Bumblebee and Sideswipe took a seat both principle and teacher frowned in mutual disapproval as the younger of the two placed his feet, comfortably on the table causing Bee to glare at him.

"Side- Scott!" He hissed warningly. The young mech rolled his eyes once again and placed his feet back down with a frustrated grumble.

"What did Russell do?" Bee asked urgently turning his head back at the two women, attempting to end this conversation as soon as possible

Mrs. Blake frowned slightly. "Well actually... Russell hasn't done anything, he's an excellent student."

Russell smiled triumphantly.

"Rather.. I'm concerned about.. other... strange.. things."

The smile disappeared.

'I bet Optimus never had to deal with anything like this,' Bee thought miserably. 'Not that he'll ever mention if he did'.

"Recently, the children in Russell's class were told to bring a photo of their family for show and tell."

Bumblebee nodded slowly still not exactly getting the point, Sideswipe was of no help whatsoever he was to occupied with trying to grab Ms. Jessica's attention, Russell on the other hand was shifting in his chair as if he already knew the reason behind this disaster.

"Well, you see Mr. Clay.. the students discovered something... interesting in the photo — "

Sideswipe glanced at the photo and whistled. "Damn, I look good."

Besides him Bee studied the photo with a smile— it was a nice family photo. Denny stood next Russell gazing at his son proudly while Sideswipe stood on the other side of Russell with an arm around the twelve year old's shoulder while Bumblebee stood at Denny's side with a hand on the junk collector's shoulder. Strongarm, Optimus, Drift, the Mini Cons, Windblade, and Grimlock were yet to be included since Fixit hadn't made them the hologram watch yet. Overall he saw nothing wrong with the photo.

Mrs. Blake and Ms. Jessica glanced up at both of them expectingly. They both continued to stare uncomprehendingly.

Ms. Jessica gave them both a worried look. "Mr. Clay, Scott, do you not see the problem here?"

"Uh... no?" Sideswipe frowned as Bumblebee continued to stare at the photo with a confused expression on his face.

"If you look closely at the background... there's.. um... a _dinosaur_."

They both leaned in closely and paled simultaneously.

Oh.

…Oh.

Oh shit.

And sure enough in the background of the photo stood Grimlock, grinning widely in his dinosaur form... with two thumbs up.

"Scrap." Sides muttered next to him sending a worried glance at a nervous Russell.

And than there was the fact that everyone even Sideswipe was staring at him expectingly. Oh Primus they we waiting for him to come up with an explanation. Damnit, Bee thought doing everything in his power to suppress an agonizing groan because seriously.. how could Grimlock be so... stupid.

"That's…not.. a dinosaur." Bumblebee said with a weak wince.

To that idiotic response Russell facepalmed while Sideswipe gaped incredulously.

"Yes it is," Ms. Jessica insisted, her eyes narrowing.

"No, it isn't."

"Yes it is."

"No, it isn't."

"Yes! It is!"

"No! It-"

"This. Is. Not. Happening." Russell whimpered hitting his head against the table repeatedly.

"Well shit, this is really bad, isn't it?" Sideswipe muttered looking between his arguing leader and Russell's teacher.

"That's enough!" Mrs. Blake hissed massaging her forehead. She turned to Bumblebee. "Mr. Clay I'm sorry to say this, but that does look like a dinosaur— "

"Ha!" Ms. Jessica exclaimed standing up abruptly with a triumphant smirk.

Everyone turned to look at her surprised.

She coughed and recollected herself, sitting back down.

"Anyway-," Mrs. Blake said glaring at her colleague. "We decided to tell you first before we call the government about prehistoric creatures coming back from the dead or-"

"Or extraterrestrial life!" Ms. Jessica exclaimed earning another glare from her boss.

Seeing that his leader was failing to fix the issue Sideswipe decided to join in. "That's totally not a dinosaur!"

Bumblebee turned to him. "What are you doing?" he hissed.

"Fixing _your_ mess." Sideswipe replied with a smirk.

"…How is this _my_ mess?"

Sideswipe gave him a 'seriously' look.

"Hello!" Ms. Jessica cried out impatiently. "I want an explanation!"

Sideswipe gave her a charming smile. "It's a wax replica."

Bumblebee sputtered.

"A wax replica?" Mrs. Blake asked uncertainly.

"Duh," Sideswipe said rolling his eyes. "My 'dad's' an artist."

"I'm a _what_ now?" Bee asked in disbelief.

"Yea, you _are_ ," Sideswipe said taking a drawing out of his pocket and unfolding it with a smirk. "See this is one of his finest pieces of art."

And sure enough the 'finest piece of art' was a drawing that Grimlock attempted to draw which consisted of two stick figures running off in what looked to be an oval instead of the sun.

"We'll.. um it's uh- nice."

"Nice," Sideswipe snorted. "It looks like the supposed sun threw up all over it." Russell snickered, but was stopped by glare from Bumblebee.

"Do you think were that stupid?!" Ms. Jessica snarled.

"Yup."

"Well were not! I know that's not a wax replica wether or not your dad is an artist..."

"Jessica shut your God damn mouth!" Mrs. Blake yelled hitting her fist against the table.

"Other than sounding like a complete idiot," The principle sighed. "Jessica does have a point, we can tell that's not a wax replica."

Sideswipe shrugged. "Eh, I guess you are smart after all."

After finishing glaring at Sideswipe, Ms. Jessica along with everyone in the room once again looked at Bumblebee expectingly there was only one thought running through his head.

He was going to murder Grimlock.

"That's... still.. not a dinosaur."

Russell began hitting his head against the table while it was Sideswipe's turn to faceapalm. Mrs. Blake sighed while besides her Ms. Jessica let out an enraged shout.

"Yes it is! It's clearly a dinosaur standing in the background-"

"No it isn't," Bee hesitated. "Dinosaurs... are extinct!"

"Well this _one_ ," The redhead pointed at the picture "Isn't!"

"This _can't_ be my life." Russell muttered in disbelief.

Sideswipe sighed patting his back comfortingly. "Now you know how I feel every single day."

"Okay, I admit it looks like a dinosaur, but that doesn't mean that it.. _is_  one!"

"Okay, than what is it Mr. Clay?" Ms. Jessica asked crossing her arms.

He blinked. "Huh?"

"If it's not a dinosaur than what is it?" She demanded again. Everyone turned there attention back to him.

"It's... uh.... it's a... animatronic." Bumblebee said weakly

Besides him Sideswipe let out a weak laugh as he gazed at the ceiling. "Take me now, Primus! End whatever's left of my pathetic, miserable excuse for a life!"

Bee glared at him before turning his attention back to the two now very confused teachers.

"A what?" Mrs. Blake spluttered.

"An animatronic... I.. uh... I work for Universal Studios and they.. um... want another dinosaur for the uh... Jurassic Field ride."

"Jurassic **Park**." Russell corrected tiredly.

"Whatever." Bumblebee muttered massaging his forehead.

"A animatronic…" Ms. Jessica murmured, shaking her head. "That makes so much sense."

Bee nodded. "Yeah," he said weakly, "My son.. spends all his time racing and someone's gotta pay the bills so…"

"You can shut up now, _dad_." Sideswipe hissed.

Mrs. Blake slumped back in her seat, shaking her head. "I don't believe this," she muttered.

"Well, what other explanation is there?" Russell said letting out a nervous laugh. "We have a real life alien dinosaur living in our backyard?"

"Well of course not," Mrs. Blake retorted. "That would be impossible."

"Great, can we go now?" Bumblebee asked urgently, eager to inflict pain on a certain Dinobot.

**(X)**

"Never again." Bumblebee muttered when they arrived back at the junk yard.

Strongarm who had been listening to another one of Optimus's war stories looked up curiously. "How'd it go, lieutenant?"

Bumblebee opened his mouth, but was beaten by a laughing Sideswipe.

"Oh Primus... now that I think about it- that was.. hilarious!"

Windblade crossed her arms with a grin. "Oh, now I have to hear this."

"I assume that things didn't go as planned." Optimus offered with a raised eyebrow.

"Not at all." Bee muttered slumping down onto the ground and wrapping his arms around his legs.

"Long story short," Russell sighed placing his hands in his pockets. "Someone needs to tell Grimlock that it's not a good idea to pose in the background of our pictures as a dinosaur. _Ever_."

"Speaking of which- where is the big guy?" Sideswipe asked.

Bumblebee lifted his helm up with fake sweetness. "Yes, where is my good friend, Grim?"

Slipstream who stood on Drift's shoulder with Jetstorm on the other shoulder pointed towards the ship. "With Fixit putting the finishing touches on his holo form watch."

"Something that should have been done a long time ago." Bumblebee hissed getting up and stomping towards the direction of the ship.

Strongarm looked up at Optimus with a concerned look. "Going to Russell's school couldn't have been that bad right, sir?"

A loud **BOOM!** was heard followed by a very unmanly scream.

Optimus sighed. "I think it was."

Russell gazed around curiously ignoring another loud explosion that echoed in the distance. "Hey, where's my dad?"

Drift opened his mouth to respond, but was cut off by an outraged Denny exiting the trailer. He seemed to be having a screaming match with someone on the phone.

"Your aren't coming for a visit, Irene! Not on my watch!"

**BOOM!**

"OW! Bee what was that for?!"

"For being an idiot!" Bumblebee snarled.

Another explosion was heard.

"I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE HELL I DID!"

"YOU SHOULD KNOW!"

"Your calling your lawyers.. well I'm calling mine!" Denny fumed. "Do I sound like I care... what do you mean your new husbands a police officer with friends... APPARENTLY YOU HAVEN'T MET MY FRIEND'S YET!"

"Hey kid," Windblade addressed the twelve year old. "Who's your dad talking to?"

Russel winced. "My- uh.. my... mom."

Sideswipe sighed and shook his head with a grin. "It's always the femme's that make a big deal out of everything."

"Excuse me." Strongarm snapped turning to glare at the red mech.

"You want to repeat that again, slick." Windblade said crossing her arms with a glare of her own.

Realizing that there was no way in hell that he would be able to stand against two very strong femme's Sides backed up nervously. "No. Nope. I'm good."

"That's what I thought." Strongarm said sharing a smug look with her fellow femme.

On the other side of the junk yard....

**BOOM!**

"I SAID I WAS SORRY!"

A maniacal laugh echoed through out the junk yard causing shivers to run down everyone's spines.

"Oh, you will be Grimlock! YOU WILL BE!"

"Um," Russell shifted uncomfortably. "Shouldn't we... like stop them."

Windblade waved a servo. "Nah, it's to entertaining so far."

"What? My dad having a screaming match with my mom? Or Bumblebee beating the hell out of Grimlock?"

"If you desire my honesty.. both." Drift offered taking a seat besides his mini cons.

"You'll sue me for child custody?!" Denny continued yelling at his ex wife enraged. "YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW THE MEANING OF THE WORD WOMEN!"

"Lieutenant Bumblebee! Please stop I'm sure Grimlock didn't bean- zzzzt- lean- zzzzt- MEAN it!" Fixit's desperate attempts to calm his leader down was followed by an unmanly scream from poor Grimlock.

"I'll MAKE SURE YOU BURN IN FLAMES DINOBOT! DO YOU HEAR ME?! **BURN!!!** "

Sideswipe tilted his helm to the side as he observed the scene "Hey, Optimus I think Bee just grabbed the Star Saber."

"Hmm, so he did." The Prime acknowledged with an amused expression on his face.

"Oh.. oh- no you wanna know what the biggest mistake of my life was?! MARRYING YOU!!!" Denny shouted ending the phone call abruptly.

"I repeat once again," Russell muttered as another explosion, scream, and maniacal laugh was heard again. "This honestly- can't be my life."

**Author's Note:**

> You have no idea how much fun I had writing this.. oh and has anyone else noticed how Bumblebee acts like the father of the team.. I know I did! Comment if you like this please and I'll be very grateful if you give me kudos! :) Thanks guys see you later! ;)


End file.
